Trying to plan and prepare the team for lockdown and becoming a Covid unit, was something very new to all of us; we’d never experienced anything like this.

As Inpatient Lead working alongside our other Clinical Leads there was a lot of pressure, we wanted to do a good job ensuring patients and staff were safe but got a lot of questions thrown our way that we didn’t always know the answer to.

Working together we found those answers and were able to keep moving forward the best we could.  As pressures on the NHS rose it was difficult not knowing how many patients with Covid we would be caring for, however we have a great team and we all came together for the love of what we do, caring for patients with palliative needs.

It was incredibly difficult being unable to allow patients’ families to visit; as a team we are used to caring for both the patients and their families so this was far from normal for us, we managed as best we could with IPads and Facebook and I think it brought us closer together as a team. I am proud to say during the lockdown those whose families were not able to visit always had a member of our team with them and weren’t alone in their final hours.

One of the highlights for everyone at Alice House but also for me personally was having a patient recover from COVID, being able to get his wife in for short respite and discharging them both together, healthy!  It was the best feeling, it really gave us all a lift and something positive came out of such a horrible time.

While we were planning for the lockdown here at Alice House, myself and my family agreed for me to move out to ensure their safety, the thought of it broke my heart!  The idea of not seeing my family including my then 3-year-old daughter for an unknown amount of time was heart breaking.

I developed symptoms whilst still at home though and the thought that I had brought Covid home to my family and my vulnerable mam, who has Asthma, was devastating but my family were so supportive (they are key workers too); we were all in it together.  So, we decided I would stay at home and that we’d all take extra precautions like showering at work and changing clothes before we came home; trying to work together to keep the risk low.  It made me so anxious going home after each shift knowing I have cared for patients with the virus and I always worried I would take it home although it did help that we started wearing scrubs which never left the building and were washed onsite.

I had my ups and downs like I’m sure everyone did.  It was frustrating not being able to see my family and friends, hearing stories of others not complying with the rules and putting people at risk really upset me, but I’d take a breath and carry on knowing I was doing my bit.  I was so grateful that I could still come to work because it was the only normal thing in my life, childcare was challenging at times but as a family we figured it out and there was always one of us home with my daughter.  She has been brilliant with it all, of course she has been bored and ‘ratty’ herself at times but mostly she’s just got on with it like it’s become the norm for her.  It’s sad and I can’t wait for the day that this is no longer the norm for any child.

I’ve missed my family and friends so much, they help to keep me sane! We all kept in touch with a lot of video calls and even though is isn’t the same as seeing them, it helps a lot. One thing I’ll take away from this is not to take the ability to pop in for a catch up with them for granted once lockdown is over; I will be living life and enjoying precious family and friend times and I am sure having lots of well over due BBQ’s and girly time!

The level of support Alice House has received has made me feel so proud to be part of the Hospice but also so proud to be part of this community, people are so kind and came together to help where they could; the donations of meals and food really lifted the team’s spirits and it meant to world to us all! We are very thankful and very grateful!

This last year has been a rollercoaster of emotions with mini battles with my own mental health and anxiety.  I am very proud of the team I am part of, we got through the hard times and we will continue to support each other and the people of Hartlepool, Stockton and East Durham.  It’s been a very strange experience one I won’t and probably all of us won’t forget but it’s one experience we would not like to re-live again.